Hello, I am Steve's Heart.
During the night I am hard at work trying to keep Steve calm. If i'm not careful my rate (heart rate) could go from a cool fifty-eight per minute to a stagering one-hundered-twenty per minute, in which case Steve will wake up, or begin to walk around unconsciencly. This is bad because if Steve is walking around the house during the night he will be exausted all day tommorrow. It is also critical for me to keep calm beacuse me freaking out may also result in Steve having some bad night terrors.
like to think of myself as Steve's gaurdian angel, I am his protector during the time that his brain needs rest. Suddenly, three quick thumps and im up, the brain shocks me, letting me know it's the morning, once again. F#*K. I scream for him to shut up. I know he's laughing, everytime he sends that shock down to wake me up. But it's fine, Steve is a cool guy, he does'nt like to get up so abruptly either. I know i only have a couple of minutes before the fight starts, so this is a crucial time for me to get prepared. Hmm, his mom is a little late today, perhaps she slept in?
"Steve, Wake up or im leaving. I said Get the F%$K Up. Hello? You def?"
Ahh, there she is. Ok lets go. You see the brain and I have a very good partnership, we are both fully aware that the morning fight is inevetable so we prepare ourselves. He knows what to say to that woman, he's the brains behind the operation. I am the foot soilder, without me, Steve or his brain would not have the strength to battle with his mother in the morning. His brain calls me the energizer bunny, i'm not a huge fan but what ever.
I dont think that Steve or his brain realize what there doing to me when they decide to not feed me. These are unsafe working conditions, and for me there is no option for strike, just to quit. I mean i get coffe sometimes, but still it's not helping me.
Does he not know this?
Friday, February 19, 2010
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Morning Routine
Eight Thirt-six. This is about the time i become consious in the morning. My mothers voice, soft and calm during the first half hour of her trying to wake me up. Unfortunately around the time im almost awake her voice is loud , aggressive, and piercing. Every morning this is how it begins.
"THAT'S IT; YOU CAN DROP OUT FOR ALL I CARE. YOU CAN'T WAKE UP, GO FIND A JOB!" I most defenatly don't blame my mother for resorting to the same barbaric techniques day in and day out. I just wish that i could be as calm and logical as i am right now. I am, what some might consider, a deep sleeper. I hate getting up in general, but waking up to a screaming mother tell you how bad and out of control you are, well that makes my teeth cringe. Not the greatest feeling in the morning. I am not blaming my mother for anything, she is simply a flint of anger, and it's to bad her son is her gasoline. We are very much alike and that is why we have so many issues, but it seems that they all stem from the same place, the morning routine.
From Eight thirty-six to about eight forty five is when most of the fighting between us occurs, and colourful words are exchanged. She is rushing about, trying to fix my brother's lunch, do dishes, get her self ready, and battle with me. During all of this im still half asleep and disoriented, so if you could imagine my sub concious is arguing with my mom. My day doesn't really start until I step into the shower at eight forty five, this is where i can reflect on what just happend. I then have a five minute shower, enough time for any guy. Get out of the shower at about eight fifty. During this whole process everything is very blurry and i think im moving at mach speed.
I didn't actually take in how close i cut it in the mornings, until i began to write this. So after tracking down my school uniform in the bombshell that is my rooom, i slap it on, and out the door. And no, i didn't forget to mention breakfast; breakfast doesn't exist in my world. Im not against the concept of breakfast, in fact i agree with everyone else, it's truly the most important meal of the day. Unfortunately i haven't had time for breakfast in years. My body is certainly used to it by now, not that im trying to justify not eating. However it's not all that bad, I leave myself a seven minute window to walk and get my morning coffee from Tim Horton's.
Perhaps the basis for all my morning problems stem from my proximity to the school; my back yard is seperated from the school by only a fence. so I know that leaving at five to nine still leaves me enough time to get to class. Maybe it would be easier to wake up if i knew that i had to travel somewhere is the morning. This is my routine, im not saying it's the best way, but i've been doing it for five years now, I don't think i could change it at this point.
"THAT'S IT; YOU CAN DROP OUT FOR ALL I CARE. YOU CAN'T WAKE UP, GO FIND A JOB!" I most defenatly don't blame my mother for resorting to the same barbaric techniques day in and day out. I just wish that i could be as calm and logical as i am right now. I am, what some might consider, a deep sleeper. I hate getting up in general, but waking up to a screaming mother tell you how bad and out of control you are, well that makes my teeth cringe. Not the greatest feeling in the morning. I am not blaming my mother for anything, she is simply a flint of anger, and it's to bad her son is her gasoline. We are very much alike and that is why we have so many issues, but it seems that they all stem from the same place, the morning routine.
From Eight thirty-six to about eight forty five is when most of the fighting between us occurs, and colourful words are exchanged. She is rushing about, trying to fix my brother's lunch, do dishes, get her self ready, and battle with me. During all of this im still half asleep and disoriented, so if you could imagine my sub concious is arguing with my mom. My day doesn't really start until I step into the shower at eight forty five, this is where i can reflect on what just happend. I then have a five minute shower, enough time for any guy. Get out of the shower at about eight fifty. During this whole process everything is very blurry and i think im moving at mach speed.
I didn't actually take in how close i cut it in the mornings, until i began to write this. So after tracking down my school uniform in the bombshell that is my rooom, i slap it on, and out the door. And no, i didn't forget to mention breakfast; breakfast doesn't exist in my world. Im not against the concept of breakfast, in fact i agree with everyone else, it's truly the most important meal of the day. Unfortunately i haven't had time for breakfast in years. My body is certainly used to it by now, not that im trying to justify not eating. However it's not all that bad, I leave myself a seven minute window to walk and get my morning coffee from Tim Horton's.
Perhaps the basis for all my morning problems stem from my proximity to the school; my back yard is seperated from the school by only a fence. so I know that leaving at five to nine still leaves me enough time to get to class. Maybe it would be easier to wake up if i knew that i had to travel somewhere is the morning. This is my routine, im not saying it's the best way, but i've been doing it for five years now, I don't think i could change it at this point.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
insightful quotations
It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.
-ZIETGIEST 2 ADDENDUM
-ZIETGIEST 2 ADDENDUM
Friday, February 5, 2010
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